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People on their deathbeds often have regrets that fit into a
few main categories. I like to read articles about this particular subject. I feel like I can avoid having certain retgret by learning from other people's mistakes. Sometimes they wish they’d had more adventure in their
lives, traveled the world, or maybe created something. Some people wish they
had developed a talent or earned a degree. Most often though the most bitter of
all regrets has to do with love, family, and relationships.
In our lives there are usually a few key people in the day
to day living. Those people consist of our live in family members, close
friends and coworkers we may see frequently, and the people we search out. The loved
ones we choose to connect with who add to our lives, and hopefully, we to
theirs.
But there are others. People who we know and love but we don’t
see as regularly due to schedule conflicts or even distance barriers. We still
connect, through the telephone, social networking, weekend visits or even
vacations. These people know we love them and they love us back.
What about the people we know, and maybe even love, who we
aren’t including in our regular lives. They’re the more distant relatives or acquaintances
that we’re content to see a few times a year at a family function or a mutual friend’s
gathering, or more infrequently even, if life prevents these occasional connections
from taking place. These are the people we know and we say hello if our paths
cross. We enjoy their company and we move on.
There are people we may see every day without noticing. The cashier
and the department store, the mailperson, the gas station attendant, the
barista at Starbucks, the janitor at work. People whose names we may or may not
know. These are the people whose lives often bump into ours, but who we have
little or no relationship with.
Now think of the people you know and how they fit into each
of these categories. Our family and close friends, our parents, our grown
children, our extended families, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, , our coworkers,
our fellow church goers, our car repair person, the trash man. These people are
all in our lives with us. We see them, they see us. How do you greet them? Warmly?
Affectionately? Distantly? Of course we apply our emotion on a case by case
basis. But what if we forget to care for someone? What if we are so intent on
ordering our macchiato that when we have a chance to connect we miss it, or
ignore it? What if we’ve place such high value on posting our current events on
Facebook that we are MISSING out on our current relationships? What if we’re so
caught up in finding out what Kim Freaking Kardashian is wearing today that we
miss an opportunity to catch up with grandma?
What if we care more about having the latest model cell phone that we
carelessly race away from our real life? What if you’re missing out on your
real life because you're too busy comparing it to your neighbors life and you
find it lacking so you’re discontent and pouting and wishing for more more
more, bigger bigger bigger, better better better! What have we become that we crop grandma out
of the baby pictures for a more polished look? What have we done? Have we
traded our family for a picture perfect lifestyle? Are there any pictures of
grandpa on your family photo wall?
That’s a regret to prevent. Choose to open your
life up to the un-pretty, the not cool, the people behind the scenes, people
who spend their free time investing into your life. Look around you; somebody
is standing off to the side, wishing for a moment of your time. Embrace the
people who actually like you and stop trying to impress the rest of the world.
You can start living your real life today
